Where I am, Where I want to be
October 30th, 2008
Where I am:
- I live in a two bedroom condo that teeters between chaos and calm.
- I eat without abandon, making excuses or trades or ‘taking the hit’ for things that I only somewhat enjoy
- I cannot exercise without a lot of nagging and almost never from myself.
- I am constantly tired, struggling to stay awake at important times.
- I feel like my time is wasted, like I am drifting through so many days without accomplishing anything of important
- I am mean to myself, I torment my mind with unwanted thoughts and can dig myself into pits of despair with little or no effort.
Where I want to be:
- I live in a two bedroom condo that is kept neat and clean. Clutter is at minimum and I can easily dust to prevent allergies. I have done some basic home repair and my kitchen is recently redone.
- I love to eat and I enjoy everything I do eat. Most important I eat in moderation. I have learned that it is not necessary to clear one’s plate when eating out. And I have learned that cooking at home can be just as rewarding as a trip to a restaurant.
- I will never be an Olympic athlete but I make an effort at keeping in shape. I try to exercise everyday, even if it is jus a walk outside. I am learning how to jog and I participate in some team sports. I see the inside of my gym once a week.
- I have accepted I am no longer a college student and thus make it bed well before midnight. When the alarm goes off, I get up rather then hit the snooze button. I listen to my body and know when I am really tired so I can adjust my sleep schedule as needed.
- I have a plan for the next few months. I have goals I’m striving to meet and I make sure that every day I do something that I truly enjoy. Work is not so scary anymore as I have systems in place to help me complete the tasks that I have to do. And work stays at work. After work, I am free to pursue my own goals.
- I am my biggest fan. I am my own cheerleader. Each time a bad thought tries to crop into my mind, I beat it back relentlessly. Sure, not every day is perfect but I try to remember how lucky I am to have a wonderful family, a loving husband and a great group of friends.